INDEPENDENT NEWS

Correctives: Penguins quail at ch*c*l*t* addiction

Published: Tue 11 Feb 2003 09:02 AM
Correctives: Penguins quail at ch*c*l*t* addiction!!!
"I'm quailing!!!" expostulated Tripitaka Adelie- Penguin, busy trying to evict Sister Mycocardial- Infarcta from the party's electorate offices in the Ross Dependency.
The Corrective Party's controversial Penguin MP today denied that any Adelie-Penguin hatchling had uncontrollable urges to run amok in schools and cause massive anarchy under the influence of illicit ch*c*l*t*:
"It's a lie, an absolute lie, and was obviously invented by those crazed nun violence advocates. Hah!!! They can talk!!! I mean, what sort of reputable religious order would accept Keth end Keem into its ranks, and do I ever mean *rank* in their case!!!"
Ms. Adelie-Penguin refused to comment on rumours that the Corrective Party organisation was trying to suspend her, preferably from on top of an iceberg somewhere in Antarctica far away from shipping routes.

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