INDEPENDENT NEWS

10 reasons we're not doing well in the boat race

Published: Mon 24 Feb 2003 11:00 AM
Top 10 reasons we're not doing so well in the America's Cup
1. The crew were mentally traumatised by the suggestion that Georgina Beyer might join the shirtless haka.
2. The crew was distracted by the mental image of Cindy Crawford firing Wayne Mapp's starting gun...
3. Helen Clark isn't the skipper -- if she was, the media would be reporting a glorious victory every day even if we lost.
4. Somehow the entire design budget ended up being used for Donna Awatere Huata's trip to the Paris fashion show.
5. The boat is overweight due to the unnoticed presence of the Ingham twins stowing away.
6. That fat guy water skiing behind the Team New Zealand boat looks a lot like Jonathan Hunt.
7. Our weather guys keep being distracted by Wayne Mowat's exciting National Radio afternoon show.
8. Helen Clark didn't appoint enough Ministers responsible for the America's Cup.
9. The crew decided to throw the competition to avoid having to hear 'Loyal' one more time.
10. We sink.
Be brave and pass it on!
St Molesworth
http://www.geocities.com/stmolesworth
Pass St Molesworth on to others but please leave this footer intact! Word of inbox is our only advertising.
You are also welcome to republish St Molesworth but please acknowledge St Molesworth ( www.geocities.com/stmolesworth) as the source.
If you received St Molesworth from a friend and you're not a subscriber, you can subscribe by emailing StMolesworth- subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit www.geocities.com/stmolesworth

Next in Comment

Dunne's Weekly: Never A Good Time To Be In Opposition
By: Peter Dunne
On Macron’s Gamble, And Biden’s Last Stand
By: Gordon Campbell
On The Freeing Of Julian Assange
By: Gordon Campbell
Muzzling The Dogs Of War
By: Eugene Doyle
Hunted Biden: The First Presidential Debate Disaster
By: Binoy Kampmark
Won’t You Please Come To Chicago? Cheri Honkala On The Democratic National Convention
By: Ann Garrison - BAR Contributing Editor
View as: DESKTOP | MOBILE © Scoop Media