INDEPENDENT NEWS

Human Flu Virus Panademic now viral

Published: Tue 25 May 2010 11:38 AM
Human Flu Virus Panademic now viral
Spokesperson for FARMS (Farm Animal Responsible Mentors Syndicate), Bernie Prince issued the following press statement “A deadly out break of “Human Flu Virus” is now spreading through out the world and all farm yard animals have now been quarantined into their barns and pens”.
FARMS recommends “frequent hoof and paw washing of all animals, and keeping them in peak health and physical condition by allowing plenty of living space, plenty of sleep, staying physically active, managing
stress levels , drinking lots of fluids, and eating healthy foods such as vegetables sourced from local farms. All farm animals are advised to avoid touching humans as they may be contaminated with the human flu virus”.
Bernie Prince also states “it is important that we keep the Mad Cows Disease, the Bird Flu and Swine flu epidemic in perspective to the current outbreak of Human Flu Virus, the victims are still recovering from these viral outbreaks that were also caused by humans but ultimately blamed on our friends and cousins, may they rest in peace”.
Ultimately the human flu virus will be blamed on one of our friends in the Animal Kingdom as the Humans look for somebody to blame for their own short comings”. Bernie asks that all Farmers act responsible to ensure that all animals are quarantined until officials are able to substantiate the rumors of “Human Flu Virus”, I urge all farm animals to go about there daily duties, eat lots of grass and grain, carry on as normal and try not to let it affect your jobs of being cute, friendly and animally - but be vigilant for any human approaching your farm as they may be carriers of the deadly Human Flu”
ENDS

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