19 June 2007
Shy people make better networkers than ‘people-persons’
Four tips to get introverts networking successfully
Shyness or ‘discomfort’around other people need not be an obstacle when it comes to networking because, despite
perceptions to the contrary, introverted people often have better networking skills than so-called ‘people persons’
–whether they’re in the job market, self-employed or business owners who need to drum up more business.
Business Network International (BNI) New Zealand Director, Graham Southwell, says networking is more popular in New
Zealand than in most other countries.
BNI New Zealand has the highest market penetration of networkers out of 37 countries (totaling more than 95,000 members
worldwide) – demonstrating that networking is an important business skill in New Zealand (the average number of members
per BNI chapter worldwide is 20 business people, in New Zealand it is 22 business people. The country has also twice won
the international award for the highest chapter average).
“It really isn’t a case of what you know, and very much one of who you know and how well you know them. Succeeding
professionally now depends on how well you connect with other people.”
Introverts are good listeners
Mr Southwell says the good news is that introverts already possess the most valuable networking skill; they’re good
listeners and they tend to ask questions later –that’s the most important quality when it comes to building long term,
profitable relationships.
“The founder of BNI, Dr Ivan Misner, says in his book Masters of Networking, that a ‘good networker has two ears and one
mouth and uses each proportionally’. Another saying I heard recently which rang true is: ‘the more interested you are,
the more interesting you will be’.
“Listening and asking questions puts the introverted person in a perfect, non-threatening position to offer advice or
help when it comes to solving problems. Gregarious people like to talk – usually about themselves – and that’s why, as a
rule, they have to work harder to make good networkers,” he says.
Overcoming the ‘initiating conversation’ hump
“What will I say?” is a question that articulates some shy people’s biggest fear: walking up to a total stranger and
starting up a conversation.
“There are a number of ways to overcome this. Firstly, don’t be afraid to break the ice with simple statements like:
‘Winter’s really making itself felt, isn’t it?’
“When attending Chamber functions or business mixers, volunteer to be a host. This makes you more official, so it’s
natural to greet people and welcome them to the event. It only takes three or four words to make that breakthrough
“Other structures that present opportunities for volunteers are children’s PTA meetings and sports events,” says Mr
Southwell.
Get motivated
The author of Networking For Everyone, Michelle Tullier, says shy people can motivate themselves by getting competitive.
“Try to remember lots of people, who aren’t half as capable, qualified, talented and nice as you are advancing simply
because they connect with others and make themselves visible.”
Choose events carefully
Mr Southwell says events with an agenda that involves networking are a good place to practice.
“Attending events, such as interactive seminars and workshops, or structured networking events with an agenda for
networking are a good appetiser to becoming a good networker.”
ENDS
About BNI
BNI is a New Zealand’s largest structured business referral organisation for small to medium businesses, and is based on
the principal of ‘givers gain’. The organisation has 86 chapters countrywide – from Dunedin to Whangarei – and more than
1,900 members who attend weekly breakfast meetings to pass business referrals to each other.
For more information: www.bni.co.nz