INDEPENDENT NEWS

Prebble With a Cause: Theft

Published: Wed 24 Jul 2002 02:36 PM
Prebble With a Cause: Theft
Richard Prebble's call for Trevor Mallard's head to roll causes Libertarianz leader Russell Watkins to ask: "Is it because Trevor has overseen the dumbing down of schools? No. Is it perhaps because Trevor is dragging early-childhood teachers out of their classrooms so he can forcibly re-train them? No," says Watkins, "it is neither of these things. Richard is upset that Trevor is not spending enough taxpayers' dollars on rugby!"
Watkins says that 'Dick Prebble and his Association of Compulsion Touters obviously needs a lesson in economics. "Let me remind Mr Prebble," says Watkins, "that the government has no money of its own to spend. Let me remind him that every dollar government spends must first be stolen from taxpayers by the Inland Revenue Department - stolen from taxpayers like Ian Mutton, who died of their attentions."
"I don't give a hairy rat's arse whether Richard thinks '$5 million dollars for the World Cup would have been a good use of taxpayers' money' as he said today - it is not Richard's money to spend!" thunders an outraged Watkins. "It is ours!"
Watkins note that Richard Prebble has now been in parliament most of his adult life - "in fact," says Watkins, "he has been there longer than any MP, with the single exception of taxi-cab fetishist Jonathan Hunt. Obviously living off stolen money all that time has led Richard to develop his own fetishes and weaknesses, including an inability to distinguish right from wrong."
"Don't be fooled," advises Watkins. "If you believe in freedom and individual rights then you should shun the Association of Compulsion Touters at this election. Their fingers itch far too readily at the prospect of getting them inside your pocket."
It's enough to make you vote Libertarianz - in Wellington Central, Whangarei, Tauranga, Hamilton West and New Plymouth.
ENDS

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