By Jason Miller
Savage animal slaughterer that she is, it’s apt that Sarah Palin has now brutally plunged a razor-sharp knife into the
very heart of the seemingly invincible doubts concerning her capacity to be Vice-President of the United States.
Wielding her chutzpah with the awe-inspiring deftness with which she employs her gun or rifle when hunting defenseless
wolves or moose, she appeared on 20/20 and left our skepticism writhing on the ground in agony, immersed in its own
blood and gasping its last.
Given her virtuoso performance with Charlie Gibson a few nights ago, John McCain might as well croak now and get it over
with. She’s ready for the presidency. All the cynics who dared to question her qualifications to become VP now have
about as much credibility as card-carrying members of the Flat Earth Society.
Sarah Palin is the person we need (and deserve) to lead us on our incessant quest for global hegemony and in our ongoing orgiastic gang rape of the Earth. A former beauty pageant
contestant noted for her fierce competitiveness who would easily qualify as a MILF in the pornography industry and who
takes great pride in her capacity to stick her head up her ass and go for it instead of “blinking,” this “lipstick
pitbull” embodies nearly all that we worship in a nation fueled principally by narcissism, arrogance, willful ignorance,
and belligerence. She may lack the obscene wealth that also triggers our reflexive genuflection, but she will acquire
that in time.
Like George Bush, who is demonstrably imbecilic and morally retarded, the “hockey mom” who “worked her way to the top
with grit and determination,” also fuels the naïve, jejune notion that “anyone can be President of the United States
because we live in a democracy.” Forget the pablum concocted to pacify the masses; the POTUS could actually be ‘anyone
who hails from a family with direct ties to the power elite of our bourgeois democracy or who shares their sociopathic
tendencies and is willing to sell their souls to do their bidding.’ But who amongst us wants to burden our atrophying
minds attempting to understand complexities when the simplistic sweet little lies are so much more palatable and takes
so few brain cells to process?
As is befitting of a huntress extraordinaire, Palin provides an endless supply of red meat for the benighted, socially conservative American masses to devour with
the ferocity of the hungry wolves she loves to annihilate:
Life begins at conception.
No abortion (including in rape and incest cases) unless it is necessary to save the life of the mother.
Abstinence only.
Our war crimes and genocide in Iraq are God’s will.
Cut government spending on socially beneficial programs but keep underwriting the squatters in Palestine and pumping
obscene amounts of cash into our murderous military machine.
Islamic extremists are “hell bent on destroying our nation.”
Russia invaded Georgia “unprovoked” and war with the Russians is a viable option.
Israel would be justified in launching a nuclear strike against Iran to preserve its “security.”
US military incursions into sovereign nations like Pakistan are necessary and permissible.
Shooting any non-human animal that moves, asking questions later, devouring their flesh in a delectable stew, wearing
their skins and furs, and mounting their heads on our walls as macabre “trophies” are our God-given rights as
red-blooded Americans.
The Alaskan wilderness, over which she presides, is a repository for OUR precious oil and we must “drill, baby, drill,”
regardless of how many species we drive to extinction and how much damage we do to the environment.
She is so rife with idiocy, devotion to “normalized violence,” and a river of venom that froths and seethes under her guise of “Christian
compassion” that it is virtually impossible to pinpoint her most loathsome and dangerous trait. However, her zealous
adherence to Western culture’s paradigm of dominionism, meaning dominion over the environment and nonhuman animals,
demonstrates and encapsulates most of Sarah Palin’s myriad sociopathic tendencies that readily qualify her to occupy the
Oval Office.
With the advent of agriculture and the subjugation of animals, humanity embarked upon a war against nature (and, incidentally, against ourselves too since we are a part of nature). Gradually becoming more and more obsessed
with controlling nearly all aspects of our environment, we grew increasingly exploitative, abusive, and murderous in our
zeal to “tame” the world around us. Genesis’s creation myth, which Palin has revealed to be a key component of her
worldview, cemented Western culture’s conviction that humans have the absolute and irrevocable right to dominate the
Earth and its non-human animal inhabitants. Even the advent of “enlightened” Humanism afforded little relief to Mother
Nature, as it underscored dominionism with its anthropocentricism and speciesism. So while Palin’s Creationist beliefs
may seem archaic and sophomoric to substantial numbers of US Americans who embrace Humanistic ideas, she still belongs
at the forefront of our human-centric charge to devour the planet.
Colonialism, slavery of human and non-human animals, genocide of indigenous people to make way for expansion, ecocide to
“clear the land” and extract OUR resources, and now unbridled capitalism and consumerism have been the hallmarks of
Western “civilization.” We in the United States are now the nexus of this culture of death that for centuries has
blasphemously extended its malignant influence under the banner of Christianity, a repugnant hypocrisy that grossly
perverts the teachings of one of the greatest spiritual leaders in history.
We are a nation ruled by the power elite, a relatively small segment of the US population in the upper echelons of the
economic, corporate, military, and political hierarchies. Our ruling class is comprised of scoundrels, cold-blooded
killers, bullies, thieves, hedonists, and avaricious pigs. The rest of us are ‘wanna-be’ power elites, indoctrinated
flag-waving true believers, apathetic by-standers looking out for number one, ‘down-troddens’ just trying to get by, or
outraged activists whose actions are effectively neutralized by the overwhelming might of the system.
So who better to serve as the “elected” face of the ruling class than Sarah Palin? After all, she is a faux populist,
physically attractive woman (proving that beauty is indeed only skin deep), fundamentalist Christian, Paleolithic
conservative, savage huntress, foreign policy nincompoop, and “corruption fighter” (with undeniable connections to
pork-barrel king, Internet expert and now indicted Alaska Senator Ted Stevens). Palin is one of “us.” Or at least what
many of us have been indoctrinated to admire or aspire to be.
Palin epitomizes the banality of evil that permeates our planet murdering nation. Nursed at the teat of our culture of
death and fiercely inculcated with the various components of its dominionism, it would be an existential impossibility
for a person of her age to extricate herself from her mental straight-jacket. On a conscious level, she is probably as
clueless about her malevolence as she is about US foreign policy and world affairs. And many of us perceive Sarah Palin
to be a God-fearing, patriotic, “average Jo” showing those damn “intellectual elites” that we don’t need no stinkin’
knowledge to “git ‘r done,” champion of “family” values and the American Way. Again, Palin is one of “us,” or what many
of us wish to become.
Whether we are conscious of it or not, we US Americans are all (to varying degrees), perpetuating the malignant
expansion of our culture of death. We are the cancer. The Earth is the patient. And the prognosis is not very
reassuring.
Sarah Palin. Death becomes her. And we have become death. Now that’s a match made in Hell. Let’s make her our
president….or at least put her one 72 year old heartbeat away…..
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Jason Miller is Cyrano’s Journal Online’s associate editor and edits the Thomas Paine’s Corner section of Cyrano’s.