INDEPENDENT NEWS

Special Report (Satire): Hurricane RITA watch

Published: Fri 23 Sep 2005 09:04 PM
Special Report: Hurricane RITA watch
White House readies response to Katrina
Bush: "New Orleans has been successfully evacuated"
Satire from freepressed.com

The Bush administration, still reeling from the devastation of Hurricane Katrina and its political fallout, is going to sit this one out.
Gulf of Mexico-- As category 5 Hurricane Rita threatened Houston, Galveston, Corpus Christie and other Gulf Coast cities on Thursday, President Bush announced that his administration is prepared for the aftermath of Katrina.
Nearly three weeks after that previous killer hurricane wiped out New Orleans, Bush says he has a plan to deal with the disaster.
"The lessons learned from Katrina will help me deal more effectively with the catastrophic presidential poll numbers resulting from my lack of response to Katrina."
The White House strategy follows a long military tradition of training to re-fight previous wars.
"You see, it's easier to do the right thing after you've already done wrong the first time around. Expectations aren't as high," Bush said.
When asked by reporters if he thought it might be a good idea to start planning for Hurricane Rita, Bush accused the press of playing the blame game.
"There will be plenty of time for that after I fuck this one up, too."
ENDS

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