Top 10 changes Bill Ralston wants to make at TVNZ
1. Give TVNZ a more 'mongrel' look: jewellery on presenters is out, dog collars and bone carvings are in!
2. Build an advertising campaign around a "Lost Dinosaurs" theme to publicise hosts Brian Edwards, Kim Hill and Pam
Corkery.
3. Replace "The Worm" with Guyon Espiner during election campaign debates to ensure results guaranteed to continue
current funding levels.
4. Hire Marc Ellis to co-host The Last Word to raise its intellectual calibre.
5. Lobby for new category in Qantas Media Awards: 'Best Punch-up with Head of TVNZ News and Current Affairs'.
6. Re-screen 'The Truth about Lesbian Sex' as an 0900 phone-in fund-raiser for the next Labour Party conference.
7. Re-name Brian Edward's new show 'Did Yer Ol' Irish Pappy Tan Yer Hide?'.
8. Next stimulating, insightful, cerebral interviewee for Kim Hill: The Mad Butcher.
9. Demand an apology from Rebecca Barry of the NZ Herald for writing that he (Ralston) 'will take up the post ... having
beaten more than 20 applicants'.
10. Replace Jim Hickey with Kylie Bax to go head to head with TV3's 'hot' weather chick Toni Marsh.
Be brave and pass it on!
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Viva la revolution!